Being a good friend means standing by someone through thick and thin.
While friendships may be struck up during good times and are often based on laughter and fun, what solidifies our bonds with the people we are lucky enough to call friends is the way we show up for one another when times are tough.
When someone you care about loses a friend, partner, family member, or pet, they will need your support to process and move past their grief.
While you should call your close friends immediately if you hear they have lost someone dear to them, it is still important to write a heartfelt sympathy card too.
Writing a sympathy letter gives us a chance to reflect on what we really want to say to a friend who is in mourning.
It is nice to give a friend a physical token of our love and support for them, instead of just sending them a text.
If you are struggling to find the right words to express your sympathy for a friend who has lost someone they love, you can take inspiration from the following lit.
16 inscriptions to write in a sympathy card to a friend
- I love you and I am so sorry that you have lost someone so dear to you. Your deep care for them tells me everything I need to know—they must have been a wonderful and generous person.
- I hate seeing you go through pain. If there is some way that I can share even a small part of the burden of your grief, please let me know.
- Here’s to a remarkable life. Your sister’s memory will live on in our hearts forever.
- I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now. Just know I am always here for you.
- It is during times of grief that the bonds of friendship are most needed. Please know that I am here for you and that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
- Know that I love you and am thinking of you constantly during this difficult time. If I can do anything to help you and ease your stress and pain, please tell me.
- I cannot comprehend the sadness you must be feeling at your wonderful son’s passing. I will be a shoulder to cry on, a person to scream at, a cook to feed you, and an assistant to organize the practical things you can’t face. I will listen to anything you want to say or happily sit beside you in silence. I love you my dear friend, and I am here for you, no matter what.
- I am so sorry about the loss of your beautiful mother. You are her likeness in every way and her generosity and sharp wit will live on in you.
- Dear friend, I am so sorry for your loss. Please don’t hesitate to lean on me in your time of need.
- There are no words for how deeply sad I am to have heard about your loss. Your grandmother’s legacy of good humor and warmth will long outlive her.
- In celebration of the life of an exceptionally beautiful soul. Your grandfather will not be forgotten by anyone who knew him, and his kindness lives on in the hearts of everyone who felt it.
- I am so sorry for your loss of your father. He was an amazing person, and no one had a bad word to say about him. I’m here for you any hour of the day or night if you want to talk about it (or not talk about it).
- I’m so sorry for your loss. You know I would do anything for you, and if there is anything I can help with during this difficult time, please just let me know.
- To my dearest friend, I cannot even begin to imagine what you are feeling. The loss of a child is something no parent should ever have to experience. Know that you are so loved. If I can help you in any way with anything at all, please call me anytime of the night or day.
- I cannot imagine the grief you are feeling at the loss of your wonderful husband. He was an exceptionally compassionate, funny, and clever man who made everyone around him feel comfortable and welcome, and he loved you more than anything in the world. If I can do anything to ease the pain of his passing, don’t hesitate to ask.
- Jackie was the sweetest, most loving dog, and Toto (and our whole family) will miss him so much. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help you grieve his loss.
Sympathy card inscriptions usually use formal language. Death is a solemn affair and many people feel that it is appropriate to use language in a condolence letter that matches the gravity of the circumstance.
However, when you are writing to a friend to show your support for them during a period of grief, you should more or less use the same language that you normally communicate in.
If you are suddenly sending your friend letters in words they don’t recognize you in, it will add to their sense that the world has been turned upside down.
As a friend who is supporting someone during a time of loss, the best thing you can do is be a stable presence in their life.
Here are a few possible messages you could write in a sympathy card for a friend that strike the perfect balance between formality and personal, supportive language.
1. I love you and I am so sorry that you have lost someone so dear to you. Your deep care for them tells me everything I need to know—they must have been a wonderful and generous person.
This is a nice message to write in a sympathy card to a friend who has lost a family member that you don’t personally know.
Saying that your friend’s care for them means they must have been a generous person is a way of complimenting both their late loved one and their own judgement and temperament.
2. I hate seeing you go through pain. If there is some way that I can share even a small part of the burden of your grief, please let me know.
Offering to share a small part of the burden of a friend’s grief is a way of communicating that you can see how much sadness they are feeling.
You are also telling them that you would take it away if you could.
While we of course cannot grieve on behalf of another person, communicating the image of the two of you shouldering the difficult emotional baggage brought on my loss together will make your friend feel less alone.
Saying you want to help someone deal with the pain they’re in is a good way to respond to bad news about a death.
3. Here’s to a remarkable life. Your sister’s memory will live on in our hearts forever.
Referring to someone who has passed away as someone who lived a remarkable life will make your friend feel that you appreciate their late loved one’s accomplishments and personality.
One of the hard things about losing someone is the fear that they will be forgotten immediately, and that all their contributions and quirks are already history.
Reminding your friend that their loved on will live on in the memories of the people who knew them will console them.
4. I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now. Just know I am always here for you.
Sometimes less is more when it comes to sympathy card inscriptions. If you’re struggling to express exactly what you mean, know that a brief message, such as “sorry for your loss,” or the above, “I am always here for you,” is often all your friend needs to hear.
The gesture of showing up for a friend in their time of need by sending a card is often a more than sufficient show of love and care.
And in any case, it is better to say less and keep your message to something short and sensitive than to write something long that doesn’t hit quite the right tone.
5. It is during times of grief that the bonds of friendship are most needed. Please know that I am here for you and that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
If the friend you are writing a sympathy card for is a person of faith for whom God is an essential part of life, telling them you are praying for them will surely be welcome.
6. Know that I love you and am thinking of you constantly during this difficult time. If I can do anything to help you and ease your stress and pain, please tell me.
If you want to communicate that you are thinking of someone, that you are aware of the difficult emotions they must be feeling, and that you want the best for them, simply tell them you love them and are thinking of them.
Follow this up by offering to help in any way you can.
7. I cannot comprehend the sadness you must be feeling at your wonderful son’s passing. I will be a shoulder to cry on, a person to scream at, a cook to feed you, and an assistant to organize any practical things you find hard to face. I will listen to anything you want to say or happily sit beside you in silence. I love you, my dear friend, and I am here for you, no matter what.
The death of a child is a uniquely difficult loss to cope with. If a friend of yours has suffered pediatric loss, they will likely struggle to find a way to confront the devastating feelings they are experiencing.
All you can do as a friend is be there for them. Offer to organize the practical things that they will find it hard to care about at the moment. Tell them you will talk to them or sit beside them without speaking.
You aren’t going to be able to make a friend feel better if they have just lost a son or daughter, so all you can do is offer to be by their side as they deal with their grief.
8. I am so sorry about the loss of your beautiful mother. You are her likeness in every way and her generosity and sharp wit will live on in you.
Writing a sympathy card for the loss of a mother is never easy.
Our mothers are our first loves and protectors.
Telling someone how much of their mother they have in them will make them feel less alone and more connected to the woman they are missing.
9. Dear friend, I am so sorry for your loss. Please don’t hesitate to lean on me in your time of need.
This is a good message to write in a letter to a friend you want to support but aren’t especially close to.
The sentiment that you want to be there for them in their time of need will definitely be appreciated, and addressing them as “Dear friend,” will make them feel that they are supported by their community and cared for by those around them.
10. There are no words for how deeply sad I am to have heard about your loss. Your grandmother’s legacy of good humor and warmth will long outlive her.
The loss of a grandparent brings back all kinds of childhood memories.
Referring to someone’s late grandparent’s legacy might help your friend organize their thoughts about the grief they are experiencing.
It can help them see their grandparent’s passing as part of the natural family cycle, and it can give them a positive sense of responsibility to carry on their grandparent’s good name and reputation.
11. In celebration of the life of an exceptionally beautiful soul. Your grandfather will not be forgotten by anyone who knew him, and his kindness lives on in the hearts of everyone who felt it.
If you were familiar with the late relative of one of your friends, talk about their positive qualities in your letter of condolence.
People going through grief like to hear that the person they are mourning was highly valued by others.
12. I am so sorry for your loss of your father. He was an amazing person, and no one had a bad word to say about him. I’m here for you any hour of the day or night if you want to talk about it (or not talk about it).
Offering to be there for someone whenever they need you is a generous thing to do when someone is dealing with the loss of a loved one.
If a friend’s father has died, finding the right words to appropriately address their grief is complicated.
One card might be perfectly appropriate for one person and cause another friend to feel worse than they already do.
If you’re sitting down to write a sympathy card for a friend who has lost their father, read through these sample messages for sympathy cards for the loss of a father to get an idea of what you could say.
13. I’m so sorry for your loss. You know I would do anything for you, and if there is anything I can help with during this difficult time, please just let me know.
This is a simple, straightforward, and loving message to send along with flowers to a friend who is in mourning.
14. To my dearest friend, I cannot even begin to imagine what you are feeling. The loss of a child is something no parent should ever have to experience. Know that you are so loved. If I can help you in any way with anything at all, please call me anytime of the night or day.
If your friend is grieving their child’s death, you don’t need to try to sugarcoat the situation they’re in.
In fact, telling them that “everything happens for a reason” or that “time heals all wounds” will probably make them feel much worse.
Instead, acknowledge the depth of the sadness they’re feeling and offer to help in any way you can.
15. I cannot imagine the grief you are feeling at the loss of your wonderful husband. He was an exceptionally compassionate, funny, and clever man who made everyone around him feel comfortable and welcome, and he loved you more than anything in the world. If I can do anything to ease the pain of his passing, don’t hesitate to ask.
When someone loses a partner or spouse they can suddenly feel totally alone and stranded.
They will re-run every little detail of their relationship through their mind, from their first “I have a crush on you” text to sending their wedding invitations, and everything before, in between, and after.
The best thing you can do for someone who has lost their spouse is prevent them from becoming stuck down memory lane and isolating themselves from everyone around them.
Sending a message that compliments their late partner is a good place to start.
Then, follow this up with more gestures of care, such as preparing dinner foods, calling them regularly, and sending a quick text at the end of the day letting them know they’re loved.
16. Jackie was the sweetest, most loving dog and Toto (and our whole family) will miss him so much. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help you grieve his loss.
For people who own pets, the loss of a furry friend is a devastating thing.
Dogs and cats become part of the family, and while people who don’t have animals don’t always understand this, their passing is a very hard blow to take.
If a good friend has recently lost their pet, show them you care by sending them flowers and a sweet sympathy card.